Ups and Downs

Well, there've been lots of ups and downs since my last post.  Of course, that's par for the course with addiction in general.  By the time you throw in jail, it's just a wild ride.  Probably not one I'd get in line for again.  :)

For some reason I've just been kind of down today.  My son called from jail this morning and he's feeling a bit down too.  That probably impacted me as well.  Mostly I'm just worn out and have too much to do here at home too.

It's not all bad news though.  My son was having problems with some people in jail that decided he'd "snitched" on them for smoking pot.  That scared the hell out of me, of course.  Fortunately he's been moved to another area away from them.  That makes me think highly of the corrections officers there.  I've been worried how he was being treated and I'm glad they're alert enough and kind enough to watch out for his safety.  The same should be true for anyone.  Just because you're incarcerated, you shouldn't be in danger.

Of course we're both a bit concerned about Thursday when he goes back to court.  Wondering what will happen.  Will he get out?  Will he get sentenced to more time?  I'm just leaving it all in God's hands and trusting that whatever happens is what is meant to be for his best.

Yesterday was a good day.  I got to talk to him for about 20 minutes and it was really positive.  In spite of being in jail being difficult, it seems like he's realizing so many things and I sense a real change in his attitude.  I heartily hope this is the beginning of big changed.  Please God.

No matter what happens, like all of you, I'm sure, I love my son to death and only want the best for him.  I miss him so bad.  In spite of all the bullshit, he's so fun and has such a great sense of humor.  We just have a ball together.  Everywhere I go in town reminds me of good times we've had there and nothing seems as bright or as fun without him.  Here's to hoping for better days ahead and that he'll soon be home and off this shit for good.  That's my dearest wish.  In fact, that's my wish for any parent and kid in this situation.  Better days ahead for all of us.